Yesterday I showed up at the DMV, hat in hand and begging for mercy, and repaid my debt to society. They issued me a paper tag to stick in my rear window and gave me until the end of July to get my smog check. (That’s dangerous. I’d better do it before it falls off my to-do list again.)
Then, to celebrate my re-entry into the ranks of law-abiding citizens, I got my truck washed. I thought about doing it myself, but then realized that a job like that is best left to the professionals. The car wash was conveniently located right across the street from the DMV. It must be a rite of passage for scofflaws to wash away their auto sins.
On the way home, I did a couple of errands, and as I was heading home from a whole different town than my own(!), I looked in the rear view mirror and, “What? Are you kidding me??” there was a policeman following me! Here’s the thing. I have been driving on this 2005 tag for a year and a half, and now twice in one week I’m getting pulled over? I eased into a parking lot and waited for my moment of glory.
- Redeeming myself into polite society by paying overdue DMV fees: $208
- Celebratory car wash of redemption: $11
- Smiling inwardly as I am jerked from my truck and thrown to the ground by yet another angry policeman:
PRICELESS
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{ 11 comments… read them below or add one }
bob 06.03.08 at 4:35 pm
was one of your “errands” putting 800 pounds of ammonium nitrate fertilizer in the back of your truck? homeland security probably has you on satellite already.
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dana wyzard 06.03.08 at 4:46 pm
When I was young, ahem, and good looking, AHEM, the kind policeman pulled me over for going 70mph in a 25mph zone.
Now, I know there’s a BIG difference between being coy and flirtatious, and downright scared shitless, but the cop didn’t know that.
So, being downright scared shitless, I started bawling my head off. I don’t cry when I’m not guilty, but guilty? I’ll cry you a freakin rainbow!
The cop got all flustered and nearly ended up apologizing to ME for pulling me over and I pulled away, promising never to do such a fowl deed again.
The real kicker was when I looked to my right and realized my daughter was in the car, staring a “I can’t believe we’re related” look at me.
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Toi 06.04.08 at 6:41 am
You know, enough is enough. I’m talking to Oprah about this. I’m starting to lose sleep over this situation.
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Karen 06.04.08 at 7:02 am
I am actually laughing outloud at you. In my office, cackling. Who have you pissed off anyway?
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dana wyzard 06.04.08 at 8:44 am
Kathi, I TOOK YOUR POST. Well….I TOOK YOUR IDEA and transplanted it to my site.
If I started listing posts concerning my youthful encounters with the local cops, I would run the risk of having some things “revisited” by those in charge. lol
Hope you enjoy my postal compliment to you.
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Melissa 06.04.08 at 12:54 pm
Well I’m sitting here laughing my ass off and decided to share my version of my licensing offenses, but I’ll do what Dana did and share them over on my blog since I was out of topic ideas for today anyway. I swear this is the flattery form of immitation
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GJG (aka GaryJay) 06.04.08 at 1:33 pm
an amusing anecdote—–thats how Rodney King became famous out here in Los Angeles—you need to find someone who captured it on cam, and leak it to the tv people. (screaming police brutality).
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Diana 06.04.08 at 7:21 pm
What? You didn’t wear that blonde wig I sent you? Those chics get away with all the bad stuff. . . of course I wouldn’t know being a brunette and all
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Kathi D 06.04.08 at 10:59 pm
Bob, that was supposed to be our little s-e-c-r-e-t! As was the blonde wig–my husband thinks that is my real hair.
If I had the tape I would just sell it on HSN.
Dana, you are a big cheater with that crying!
And you know, I was going to say, “Don’t bother Oprah with this little thing” but helicopters have been circling the house all day. Who have I pissed off, indeed??
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Rose 06.06.08 at 7:51 am
I hope that policeman didn’t hurt you? By the way Dana sent me here.
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Kathi D 06.06.08 at 9:52 am
Didn’t hurt me? With THAT beating?
Naaaaah, I’m tough.
Thanks to Dana! and welcome, Rose!
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