The Wii Fit is also a gossip

by Kathi D on July 23, 2008

The Wii Fit, which we have previously outed as snoopy and a damn liar, has lately been revealed as a ruthless and nasty gossip.

The other day, Rick signed on to do his workout and was greeted with, “Hey! We haven’t seen Kathi around here lately!”

I don’t see why it is necessary for the Wii to be all up in my business and ratting me out to the world. Put a sock in it, Wii-man.

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Bend, Oregon, Bebe Rebozo, and Dick Nixon

by Kathi D on July 22, 2008

Tag, I’m It

Melissa, who tagged me for this, lives and blogs (smartly!) in Bend, Oregon, which is a near-mythical place in my family, because my mother-in-law was born there, and once when Rick and I were there and I was in my collecting ash trays phase, I found a Mt. Bachelor ash tray with a hand-painted image on it that totally looked like Dick Nixon and Bebe Rebozo. You young folk might have to google that.

Ten things I’ve done that you probably haven’t:

  1. At the tender age of three, had measles and chicken pox at the very same time, thus embarking on my Life of Danger.
  2. Ate lunch with the mountain gorillas in Zaire. They had better table manners than your average teenager, although, strictly speaking, there was no table, just bamboo and mud.
  3. Took third place in the toy parade competition in third grade for my doll Elizabeth who wore a blue dotted Swiss dress to match my own.
  4. Rode shotgun on a 4-seater airplane circling Denali, the highest point in North America.
  5. Ate a bologna sandwich on white bread at the southernmost point of the U.S., Ka Lae, Hawaii.
  6. Rode a rickety bus to the northernmost point of the U.S. in Barrow, Alaska (are you sensing an obsession? It’s Rick’s, and I just go along for the rides).
  7. Saw Jim Morrison, Janis Joplin, and Elvis live in concert (not at the same time).
  8. Won an “I danced with Ellen” t-shirt for my awesome(ly bad) dancing at the Ellen DeGeneres show.
  9. Told an “iffy” joke to a United States Supreme Court Justice and received a tiny, tight smile in return. Later, became BFF with same, after reliving respective girlhood days in The Wild West.
  10. Eight years old, ate 14 just-picked peaches in one sitting, and if they tasted that good, would do it again right now.

Thanks for today’s blog, Melissa! How about the rest of youse guys answering this?

I may be sporadically blogging the next 10 days or so, because we will be travelling. Neighbors on all sides are vying for chicken-sitting duties, but Margarita (Not Her Real Name) will be doing it, since she is the chickens’ Auntie. Some of them may even lay their first eggs for her, but I will be taking names and punishing any who do.

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Just hanging with the Johns

by Kathi D on July 21, 2008

OK, so first, I was totally right about the mystery dog #2 being a Poodle named Little Edie. Here she is.

So maybe I was just a TEENSY bit wrong. He’s a German Shepherd named Eli. So I was close. Here he is with Edie.

They are being cruelly shut out of the gazebo where the humans are dining on pork ribs. Call the humane society, quick! Because then we had pie, and they didn’t get any of that, either. Rick picked those blackberries out of the front yard just in time to go in the cobbler.

The neighbor dog, who was visiting along with Margarita (Not Her Real Name) and FlaVio (Not His Real Name) apparently needed some discipline, Edie-style.

This upset Big John so much that he needed a time-out.

While all this was going on, nobody knew where Little John was. Now that I know what he was doing, let me just warn you, KEEP YOUR GAYS AWAY FROM YOUR CHICKENS!! Serious. Check out the Before and Afters.

BEFORE

AFTER

Now, I will admit I admire the great hairdressing, er, featherdressing talent. But the chickens just aren’t acting right today. They are all uppity. I need to do a shampoo and combout. Thanks, Little John.

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